"Last week just before dawn I was out in da barn and I smelt somfin burnin. So I ran out of the barn in I sawd smoke commin from my wheat field. So I got a bucket a wada a ran to the field but what I seen was crazier dan a horntoad getting a puckerup by a princess.Dare was a beautiful lady commin out of the field and when she took a step, a firey foot print lay in the wake I guarantee, Dis is what id saw. She looked right at me smiled and said “its is time “ then looked up into the sky grew giant bat wings and flew away.I wonder what she ment"
"This barony is rot for luck. Just when I thought my farm had escaped from Drow and a Beholder along comes a swarm of goblins... They are like rats..."
"I was comming out of Kaladonia by way of the Valdalis Crossroads last night and boy was it bustling there. Looks like a wagon train is making its way into The Propper. Guessing by the look of them wagons looks like a clan or two of Gypsy..."
"I'm telling ya they was gremlins digging through my compost! No they wasn't goblins, they all follow them Imperials don't they? What do you mean tribals? Tribals will gnaw the arm off your body if you get too close, what would they be doing with my old apple cores?"
"That crazy sorcerer Malyc still running around? Why don't we just have an old fashioned burning at the stake and be done with it. Or why can't he be like other crazy wizards and go build a tower somewhere and leave us alone. Damn magic users."
"All my horses are gone! All I found were a few bones laying around the stables with teeth marks all over them. Who would eat a freaking horse?"
"Let me tell y'all something, horse meat is just as tasty as any beef I've every had! Ya just gots to know how to prepare it is all..."
"Dang'gubit! I was walken on that tharn raod over thar when bandits jumped out at me! Just as I was about to hand ove' my ol' sack, the bandits dun got jumped by goblins! Where in the thrice blasted hells are the guards these days?!"
"Some unmarked ships were fighting a battle way off shore in the quail straits...Sounded like a thunderstorm... After a while one of them caught fire and blew up in a massive explosion... Who knew the pirates had such powerful mages in their crew!"
"In the Far East I hear that men worship an immortal Dragon-God-Emporer! His palace is the size of Loez thrice over! He has ten thousand wives and ten thousand slave-gladiator eunuchs to protect them! His army boasts ten times ten times ten thousand elite swordsmen, all fanatically loyal to the death! One day, his eye will turn to the west..."
"I was walking down the path to the monastary the other night when a shadow sprung up and leapt past me from the side of the path... the strangest thing was, though, when I turned around to look where it had went, there was nothing there..."
"I don't like any of this hoodoo an' voodoo they keep talkin' about with them wild mages... they're a danger to everyone they're around an' all who show 'em kindness! No good bus'niss that whole lot of em."
"Odd, after all that hub bub we don't see any more of them darkies around. I be guess'n something scared em away. Now I was nev'r one to be scared of no darkies, but I been hearing rumors lately o' what happened that make my hair stand on end."
"One of my friends said some people traveled to the future to stop the future from happening, now that is just cornswaggle. We Chroniclerites know that the future is set. What is will always be."
"I heard one of the most respected Generals of New Gaaldron was exiled for impotence."
"There is something awful rising in Markovia, I just got out before whatever is happening started really happening. On my way here I ran across a caravan of undead, I thought I was dead for sure, but they paid me no mind. I stood there and watched as they passed me by transfixed by the horror of it all. At the center of the procession was fifty foot hight coach, pulled by a hundered armored and quite dead horses, staring at this I felt as though my life was draining from me. I woke the next morning coughing up black blood. Living in Markovia I have seen horrors that you would not believe, but what is coming upon those blasted lands now even care not to believe."
