2 Pudgy Cats need a home

My mother has decided to live the dream & move down to Florida to retire.  However, her new place doesn't take pets.  So... she needs to give up her 2 cats.  The 2 cats are pudgy (read: FAT), arrogant, housebroken, good health, and are of middle age or so.  I would take them in, but my apartment doesn't allow pets either.

Anyone willing to adopt/put up with 2 cats that will rule your home as their own, flop down on your chest/face/head/lap and demand attention when you're really busy with work, or will act superior than you all the time b/c your own mother likes them more than you... please let me know.

/....long or short haired?

I believe them to be long haired.

mobile furry houseplants and organic pest control units.  The re NOT cats

Mmm - cats are notoriously bad spellers.  They think cat is spelled god.

My mom sent me a massage.  Her "favorite babies" are a mix of American & British Short Hair she thinks.  The vet has the exact stuff.  She'll get the paperwork to me soon.

The cats are (in her words) well-behaved, loving, intelligent, loyal, & never disappoint by not calling their mother at least once a week.    Mom can also throw in all their toys, litter box, & other peripherals.