You need to change your name Mike. I suggest dropping Michael and switching to John.
Maybe change the last name to "Doe" to go along with it.
"Ok we can attack... but if we miss, we'll hit the villagers."
"I'm willing to take that chance!"
Things I am no longer allowed to do in an RPG :
31. The backup trap handler is not whoever has the most HP at the time.
73. Not allowed to name my cudgel Ceremonial Whoopass Stick.
74. My thief's battle cry is not "Run And Live"
[OOG Jenna