Bizarre Knight Realm Character Facts

1) Shen has two speeds:  Meditate and Kill
2) The citizens of Travance are afraid of Lord Fallow.  Lord Fallow is afraid of Wally.
3) Shen once kicked a horse in the chin.  Its descendants are known as giraffes.
4) Valos said "Let there be light."  Solomon Darkheart said "Say please."

Geoffrey the Peasant invented the color black.  In fact, Geoffrey the Peasant invented every color in the visible spectrum.  Except pink.  Magnus Zero invented pink.

Geoffrey the Peasant doesn't teabag the ladies, he potato-sacks them.

Geoffrey the Peasant once made sweet love to an entire convent of Valosian nuns.  The result of this union was a little family called the Tellingasts.

Geoffrey the Peasant destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.

Geoffrey the Peasant's hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.

While urinating, Geoffrey the Peasant is easily capable of welding mithril.

It takes 14 puppeteers to make Geoffrey the Peasant smile, but only 2 to make him destroy an orphanage.

Geoffrey the Peasant doesn't play god. Playing is for children.

Cinder's tears cure nothing, which is a shame, since he cries all the time.

Thomas Ahlman once pulled a single hair from his beard and used it to skewer 3 orcs.

Osred doesn't read books, he simply stares at them until they give him the information he wants.

There is no head under Yngwie's hair, only an empty quiver.

Apollo likes to knit sweaters in his free time. By knit I mean eat. By sweaters I mean babies.

As a side note, this game is a lot of fun when applied to Andre the Giant and how he was a love enducing cuddly teddy bear in real life.  Example:

One of the deleted scenes from Malcolm X has Andre the Giant giving him a hug during his trip to Mecca.  Explains an awful lot, doesn't it?

Geoffrey the Peasant invented the color black.  In fact, Geoffrey the Peasant invented every color in the visible spectrum.  Except pink.  Magnus Zero invented pink.

Quote for truth.

Also:
Witch Hunters don't sleep, they wait.

Solomon Darkhart is 10 feet tall, breathes fire, takes Slays standing up, and kills 700 year old pirates with each hand.

Bullywugs were originally stationary and didn't know how to travel.  They learned to leap & bounce by watching drunk gypsies on Victor Silas.